On a couple of occasions in September I sat down to write something on my blog and the words would not flow!!
September for me was a real mixed bag with the return of several episodes of binge eating but also overall success with significant milestones being achieved. The BIG 30kg goal and 30% loss were ticked off and a real personal high of getting into the 60's again!! But along with those successes came a great fear that I had reached a point where in the passed I have got to on to many occasions over the years which had also been a turning point and the upwards climb would begin.
I do not want to go through that EVER AGAIN but it is something that is absorbing my thoughts!! Maybe its a good thing as I have heightened my resolve to succeed but that fear of failure is very much at the fore of my thoughts and the successes have faded into the background.
With the dawn of a new Month I have started a new Non Scale Victory list. This list will be about changing my thought processes from a negative fear of failure to one focusing on the success.
I plan to see a psychologist and explore the reasons that I have not let myself succeed in the past.
I am determined to break the cycle......